Digging for one’s past can be a two-edged sword. My cousin went to Australia to start a new life and he had a son. This son was unaware of any of his father’s family until his father died and he found a contact. This was not all he has found.
I knew my cousin was a flake for the first water, but I had no idea this extended into his immediate family. The poor boy learned that his father had not bothered to marry his mother, now diseased. It is one thing if a relationship is out in the open and acknowledged for what it is. It is entirely another if it is purported to be one thing and is in fact another. How can a person do that to their own kid? No idea.
What I could do for this young man was to give him access to my Ancestry site so he may know of the origins of his roots. It won’t take away the pain of learning what he did, but it may help knowing the rest of his extended family aren’t flakes and welcome him. So not impressed with my cousin.